Crush vs. Doink. Crush beats the hell out of Doink through the majority of the match, then another Doink comes out and Crush-es a cast over the HawaiianǃÙs head. Then the twins stare at each other in awe and do a fantastic mirror act. Match over. The announcers try to sell it and debate whether what they saw was just an illusion. Really. Michael Cole goes to the audience for their opinion and asks a Japanese photographer his opinion of the situation, his reply is ǃ?Yokozuna!ǃ?
Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund. Oozing machismo the entire time, Razor beats the hell out of the seventy-two-year-old Bobby Back. At least he respects his elders and accepts the handshake before the match.
No he doesn’t. HeǃÙs a bad bad man.
Money Inc. vs. Mega Maniacs (Ted DiBiase & IRS vs. Hulk Hogan and a masked Brutus the Barber Beefcake). The Million Dollar Man hits the Barber with a solid gold suitcase while IRS distracts the referee. Bobby Heenan says, ǃ?You could call that move a Beefcase!ǃ? Fantastic
Hulk Hogan is interviewed about the main event, Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna. Hulk Hogan says something about testing the spirit of Hulkamania and issues a challenge to both, getting on that WWII tip, ǃ?IǃÙll wrestle the winner for the title, doesnǃÙt matter if itǃÙs Hitman or the Jap, brother!ǃ?
Giant Gonzales vs. the Undertaker. The good thing about watching these old WWF DVDs is that sometimes theyǃÙre from events long enough ago that I donǃÙt know who the winner is and itǃÙs the first time. But then I remembered the UndertakerǃÙs undefeated Wrestlemania streak (greatest streak in sports) and the match was ruined. The announcers yell that Gonzales is eight feet tall at least every fifteen seconds. Then he chokes the Dead Man with a cloth soaked in ether. And Macho Man mispronounces chloroform a number of times.
Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna. Worst ending ever. Yokozuna beats Bret Hart and Hogan beats Yokozuna two minutes after in an impromptu match. ThatǃÙs not right. I remember I had the WWF the Magazine issue with recaps of this PPV. I was too young to understand the value of captions so I was confused seeing Hogan with the belt when it was clearly a match between Yokozuna and Bret Hart. IǃÙm still confused as to why this was legal.
That ending isnǃÙt fit for any sport. ItǃÙd be like the Mavs beating the Heat by throwing salt in their eyes at the end of game 7 and the refs not knowing, then the Spurs coming out and Shaq giving the thumbs up for the Spurs to play for the championship in a two minute sudden death. And the Mavs trying to throw salt in the Spurs eyes but they end up blinding their own teammates because Duncan and company duck and dodge the salt, except Ginobili who flops. Then the Spurs run the floor and the championship changes hands. Yah, thatǃÙs what itǃÙd be like.