I went camping this weekend with the Oak Harbor guys. I’m gonna share some camping memories in no particular order.
We usually have an electronic version of Taboo with us and two moments stick out for me. One of the first years Matt said “Ice cream with three flavors” and we knew exactly what he was thinking—that the vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry mix is called Napoleon. And last year Glenn said “Old man with a cane” and after time ran out Marvin (who was judging the round) said “The word was… pour-poyse?” It was porpoise.
The first time we camped we were tossing leftover eggs in the air to catch. Someone launched one up and my brother backed up to catch it then fell over backwards on a small boulder. And waved his limbs around like a turtle. That’s how I remember it.
One year, Jerry had to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night so he got up and walked to the far bathroom with just a pocket flashlight. He shot to the top of my Bravest People I Know list. Another year, Curt had to go #2 but the toilet was clogged so he just went on top of another #2 that was already there. Looking back, I’m surprised we didn’t call this The #4 Special or something like that.
Here’s a quick rundown of Junior’s bad luck at camping. One year I closed the car door on Junior’s head when he already had a headache. He left in the middle of that night (and I woke up groggy when he got picked up and woke up the next day thinking he jogged ten miles back home). And another year he leaned back in his chair and fell backwards into the bushes. Last year he threw up and we got to dig a hole and bury it. And he also had to leave early and miss all the group pictures.
Last year UW beat USC and the UW alumni sat in the car and listened to the end of the game. Last year, cell phone reception improved and that made things a little more convenient but took some of the charm away from camping.
Our first year camping, the ranger came by during our game of Taboo and said we had too many people for one campsite but that he’d let it slide since we had no alcohol. At the time, I wondered why he was so surprised that nine guys at a campsite didn’t have a drop of alcohol. At the time, I also attended zero parties except for my friends’ LAN parties, which I usually hosted. Everybody, please, a round of applause for my high school life!
We let Matt cook the bacon one of the first times we camped. He ripped open the package and dropped the entire three pound block in the pan. The rest of us looked at him ready to chuckle at the joke, but he didn’t blink so we just gave blank stares to each other. He’s an avid camper though so maybe he knew what he was doing. Need some kind of knot? Ask Matt. Need to build a good fire? Ask Matt. Need bacon reminiscent of zombie flesh? Ask Matt.
This year we went hiking and came back and found out the birds pecked through all of our bread and poo’d all over our campsite. And they even opened the bag of Doritos which impressed me because you can hold a bag of Doritos right next to your nose and you won’t smell the chips inside, but they knew what was inside. It was like the Jurassic Park raptor opening the door with the door handle, except not like that at all. I was a little mad but it was mostly just funny to me because eating our bread or pooing on our site would each be bad alone, but they did both.